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I am always in awe at the human brain (any brain, for that matter—cat, dog, bird, fish, etc.). Human brains in particular are exceedingly complex. Imagine 100 billion neurons with more connections than there all the known stars in the universe. There’s almost nothing it’s not capable of…well, maybe one thing. Ignoring negativity is hard for us. Negative events are like Velcro to the brain!
Is there someone at work who annoys you—and you know you’ll remember it until the day you die? Do you still recall the nasty and insensitive comment your sister (brother, parent, friend, fill-in-the blank) made back in 1993? Don’t feel bad—your brain is wired that way!
Your brain has what is called “a negativity bias” which means that its survival programming constantly scans for anything that might go wrong. And when it does, the brain remembers this so it can avoid it next time. Of course, you can’t always avoid your boss who may be under stress herself or distressing daily news.
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How to Find Joy and Overcome the Negative Brain
Here are 3 strategies for rewiring your natural inclination for glomming onto doom and gloom!
1) Take five slow, deeper than normal breathes. Notice how good this feels! These will shift your focus and turn on the body’s relaxation system.
2) Remember a time when you were feeling joyful and happy. This can be a time when you were with a friend, a pet, or any other situation where you felt positive. Recall all the details about that event, letting yourself completely soak it in.
3) Call someone who makes you laugh or feel good. Meet them for a cup of coffee and make this good time last. Look for times like this throughout the day where you can find and share enjoyment with others.
Donald Altman, M.A., LPC, is a practicing psychotherapist, former Buddhist monk, Emmy-Award-winning writer, and board member of The Center for Mindful Eating. His new book is The Mindfulness Code: Keys for Overcoming Stress, Anxiety, Fear, and Unhappiness.
From: Rachel Messenger | 6/4/10 at 11:31 am
Isn't it amazing what our brains can do for us?
In fact, the latest neuroscience research indicates that you can indeed choose positive thoughts, allowing you to create new connections within the brain and overcome some of your negative "tapes."
In addition to the great advice here, it's also helpful to create positive mantras or affirmations when you find yourself playing those negative reels over and over in your head. The key, of course, is to practice mindfulness, because so many of those negative patterns occur without our even noticing.
If you're not comfortable creating your own mantra, try Googling "positive affirmations" or visit Louise Hay's website at http://www.louisehay.com/affirmations/index.php for a new, daily affirmation.
Louise's affirmation today? My life works beautifully.
It positively does.
From: Donald Altman | 6/7/10 at 4:59 pm
I like what Rachel says about creating positive mantras, or a daily affirmation. It's a lot better to have something positive repeating in your head than something negative!