Courtesy of chicagonow.com
When the traditions of your holiday are disrupted or things haven’t unfolded the way you want them to, it can feel uncomfortable. It is, after all, a social season, so you’re dependent on the cooperation of other people and circumstances for the season to feel right. Even with the best-laid plans, the season’s sentiment can take you by surprise.
It's hard to feel content when you don’t get what you want for Christmas. For some, traveling home for the holiday is just not an option this year. Others have lost family members and are searching for a new way to celebrate. Sometimes it comes in the form of disappointment, when your dearest friend cancels your holiday celebration date. Or, maybe you just wanted to see your friend open the gift you so carefully choose and they decide they’d rather save it for Christmas morning. The smallest things can make you feel sentimental around the holiday. And the holiday blues come rolling in.
An antidote to the blues: Focus on the feelings of others. When you are feeling disappointed about your holiday situation you are thinking about what the holiday isn’t giving you, rather than what the holiday is about. No matter what faith you follow, the winter holidays are understood as a time to appreciate and recognize the gift of life. Even when it feels like the most treasured aspects of your life are not showing up for “you,” recognize that they are simply not showing up. Once you take “you” out of the reaction, you will continue to feel connected and be better able to respond to the heart of the situation. Without personalizing the event you stop thinking about what the person isn’t giving you, and instead, what that person is about.
Disappointment creates an opportunity to connect. As you experience disappointment, examine if your ill will surrounds what others, intentionally or unintentionally, did or didn’t do in relation to you. Often you’ll find that your disappointment is due to your reaction to the situation, not the situation itself. This realization helps you appreciate the various personalities and perspectives that are at play in your life, and recognize every situation as an opportunity to connect more honestly. Disappointments can be transformed into magical moments by being curious, understanding of, and grateful for all that unfolds.
So when you feel disappointed about Christmas day, New Years day, or any day, imagine not being at the effect of the situation, and watch how the situation transforms into wonderment and open-heartedness.
What do you do to cheer yourself up during the holidays when stress, emotion, and anticipation get the best of you?
Tammy Wise is owner of BodyLogos Inc. Active Meditation for Fitness, Beauty & Wellness. Please visit her websites at BodyLogos.com.
