Years ago, a friend recited a Rainer Maria Rilke quote that resonated within me. It was an excerpt from Letters to a Young Poet, dealing with a subject we all know: doubt.
"And your doubt may become a good quality if you train it. It must become knowing. It must become critical. Ask it whenever it wants to spoil something for you, why something is ugly. Demand proof from it. Test it. And you will find it perplexed and embarrassed, or perhaps rebellious. But don't give in, insist on arguments and act this way--watchful and consistent, every single time. And, the day will come when, instead of being a destroyer, it will become one of your best workers--perhaps the cleverest of all that are building at your life."
Without a doubt, doubt left unconfronted can be consuming. Its multifold sources can be deep rooted and humbling to tackle. Doubt might stem from fear, fierce imagination, unresolved and painful memories, attachment to unrealistic expectations or fantasies, a less tempered ego, jealousy, general misperception.
Speaking from the perspective of Ashtanga yoga (the eight limbs of yoga defined by the sage Patanjali 2,500 years ago in The Yoga Sutra), the causes of doubt result from misunderstanding of the 5 vritti, or modifications of the mind (comprehension, misapprehension, imagination, deep sleep, and memory). This creates avidya, or misperception. The ultimate goal of yoga is to fully understand the inner workings of the mind, the vritti, in order to point it in a truly singular direction. This is achieved very slowly, one step at a time, through systematically refining the way we interact with ourselves and the world around us. On this path, positive self-confrontation is essential.
Today, sit with your doubt as if it belonged to a good friend. Observe it objectively. Ask it questions. For example, are doubts about a relationship really about the other person or about unresolved insecurities within yourself? What causes you to doubt the ability to follow through with an ambitious project? Is there a fear of failure or in your ability to trust yourself and the workings of the world around you? Sit with what you find and, in time, it may powerfully work to your advantage.
As you work, please be loving toward yourself. As we delve deeper within, difficult truths about our perception of self and the world around us are bound to arise. Though initially unpleasant, remind yourself that all truth is truth and ultimately beneficial.
Yoga brings stability and calm into every discipline of Sophie Herbert's life. She is an alignment focused yoga teacher (and perpetual student) and a Whole Living contributing editor. She graduated from the Cooper Union School of Art, where she nurtured her passion for documentary photography. It was during this time that she began her disciplined and diverse study of yoga in New York, Paris, and India.
Sophie has lived, studied, and volunteered extensively in India. She feels grateful to still visit and work regularly with the Deenabandhu Children's Home in Chamarajanagar, Karnataka. In November of 2010, she became an ambassador for Yoga Gives Back www.yogagivesback.org, a grass-roots nonprofit that helps destitute women and girls in India build more sustainable lives. Sophie has also shared her knowledge of yoga at the Prana Yoga Center in Astana, Kazakhstan. Currently, she teaches at the Park Slope Yoga Center www.parkslopeyoga.com in Brooklyn and privately. Sophie is also an avid cook.
